Bent Out of Shape – Opening Chapter

Bent (throwing shade)

I’m quite excited at the impending release of my new book on Wednesday 1st July so I thought I’d share a snippet to tempt you all.

Hope you like it…and if you do, don’t forget to download the full book from Amazon on 1st July.

And if anyone would like a free copy in exchange for an honest review, please drop me a line :).


Chapter 1

Lily stretched herself out on her sofa, hearing a soft click somewhere in her back. Brilliant. Not only had she consumed enough alcohol earlier to completely negate the effects of her detox, she had now slept in such an uncomfortable position that all that yoga had pretty much been a waste of time.

Stretching out again, she rolled herself off the sofa, reached for her glasses on the coffee table and walked through to the kitchen to drink as much water as she could physically consume. She was still dressed in the same clothes she had worn when she caught the flight home, vaguely remembering that because of the combination of being so tired so could barely function and the post-alcohol come-down, she had crashed out on her sofa, not even able to make it to the bedroom. She had managed to take her contact lenses out though, so that was one thing. The mix of hard liquor, a ten hour flight and the difference in times zones had really mucked her up.

Checking the little clock on her oven, she saw it was only 8PM, which explained why it was just starting to get dark outside. Peeking through the net curtain in the kitchen at the pink tinged sky, she tried to work out how her fear of flying had gotten the best of her this time. Normally it wasn’t too bad. She could usually try and ignore it, calming herself with her breathing then when she was in the air and the plane had levelled out, she could sometimes forget about it until landing. But this flight had been bumpy and that had made her so nervous, to the point she was convinced she was going to die. And the passenger seated next to her hadn’t helped matters.

Oh God.

Now it was all starting to come back to her. She had been feeling nervous enough about the long flight but she was hardly going to turn down an invitation to go out and stay at an old friend’s yoga retreat in China. Because the stipulation of the invitation from Faith had been that Lily would not be paying for a single thing during the two-week stay, Lily had decided to splurge and fly out First Class in an effort to try and make the flight more comfortable. The flight out had not been too bad. Then Lily had enjoyed the most relaxing two weeks of her life, catching up with her old friend and learning a lot of new techniques she would be able to use with her own classes. But then the flight home had ruined it all.

There had been a horrendous storm the day before which was just about easing when she took her seat on the plane. All of the airline crew she had asked on the way from the terminal to her seat had told her with a smile that the conditions were fine to travel and there was nothing to worry about. It was meant to comfort her, but it really didn’t. Then things got significantly worse when the man assigned to the seat next to her flopped into it.

She turned to give him a friendly acknowledgement seeing as they would be sat next to each other for ten hours but froze as soon as she got a proper look at him. For whatever imaginably cruel reason, some higher power had decided to seat her next to the bane of her childhood and adolescent life – Dylan Hawkins.

They had lived next door to each other all through their youth and had grown up together. Once they had realised their children were in the same Nursery class, both sets of parents jumped from politely saying good morning to each other when putting out the bins to becoming full-blown friends. Inevitable play dates followed as the families met up for a coffee in the afternoon or a barbeque on a Sunday during the summer. But Dylan didn’t seem to want to be friends with a girl, no matter how much his parents forced him. Throughout their childhood, he had constantly teased her because of her untameable curly red hair and from the age of six, the thick glasses she was required to wear and was quite happy to torment her with mud and worms. By the time they reached their adolescence, they were no longer forced to be friends and went their separate ways, save for the occasional Stewart-Hawkins get-together. They moved in very different circles at school. He had a natural charm and charisma that helped get him out of most of the trouble he was causing. Along with his bad-boy good looks, it seemed he could do no wrong. Lily on the other hand quietly plodded through school, focusing on her work, waiting for the awkward teenage years to finish.

She had managed to avoid him in the years since they’d left school and hadn’t seen him since they were about eighteen. She remembered he worked in London and spent his time there, very rarely visiting his parents, making them go to him instead. Thankfully in the eight years since they had finished school, she had never run into him at one of his parents’ summer barbeques or New Year’s Eve parties.

Dylan looked a lot different since she had last seen him. Gone was the floppy hair and the leather jacket, replaced with a shorter cut that was meticulously styled and a crisp, white shirt. But he did look a bit rumpled too. Strands of his dark brown hair were falling away from where he had applied product, there was a thick line of stubble across this jaw and it looked as if he had been wearing a suit but had abandoned the jacket and tie, rolling up the sleeves of the shirt up and leaving the top two buttons undone.

She knew vaguely what he looked like these days from pictures his mother had shown of him if they had crossed paths at some point, but in the flesh he looked so much better and it annoyed Lily no end. He was just the right amount of dishevelled to be incredibly attractive to most women. Not to Lily though – she was never going to find Dylan attractive.

He had given her a slow, easy smile in return and Lily almost breathed a sigh of relief that he didn’t recognise her. She did look a lot different to the last time he had seen her after all. But then recognition flickered across his face.

“Lily? Lily Stewart?”

She tried to fix her face into a look of confusion, as if she didn’t know who he was, complete with a polite smile. “Yes?”

“It’s Dylan Hawkins. Wow, what are the odds we’re sat next to each other on a flight back from China?”

“Oh hi. Sorry, I didn’t recognise you.” Liar “How are you?”

“I’m really good. Flying home after a business trip. What brings you to this end of the world?”

“My friend just opened a yoga retreat in the mountains and invited me to stay for two weeks to try it out.”

He just continued to smile at her, as if he was genuinely glad to see her. “Mum did mention you teach yoga now. It definitely explains why you look so great.”

Her stomach gave a little flip at his compliment that she couldn’t stop. She even noticed his eyes drop down as if looking the length of her body. Well, if he thought he was going to charm her, he would be bitterly disappointed. In the latter years of school, he showed every sign of becoming a serial womaniser but Lily definitely wasn’t one of those giggling air-heads he seemed to have had a taste for.

“Excuse me madam?” One of the air hostesses who Lily had asked about the weather conditions on more than one occasion appeared next to Dylan’s seat. “I’ve been advised the weather has worsened ever so slightly so the plane may experience a bit of turbulence on take-off until we get into clearer skies. It’s absolutely nothing to worry about and is perfectly normal. I just wanted to let you know what would happen.”

“Thank you,” Lily managed to reply in a tone that did not convey the fear that was swelling inside of her.

“My pleasure,” she smiled back. “Can I get you anything?”

“No, no thank you.”

“Yes.” Dylan calmly cut across. “Can we get two glasses of the best whiskey you have on board please.”

After the stewardess tottered off with her new instructions, Dylan turned his attention back to Lily. “Nervous flyer?”

“Something like that,” she admitted.

“Best way to handle it is to have a drink,” he said matter-of-factly.

“I don’t drink.”

“Trust me, it will help. You don’t have to have more than one but it will take the edge off things and help relax you.”

She thought about arguing but short of getting off the plane and walking home, she didn’t really know what else to do and right now she was willing to try anything. So when the waitress returned with the two glasses, she followed Dylan’s lead and threw hers down her throat, coughing as it burned on the way down.

But it seemed the stewardess had been ill-informed and the turbulence was more intense and lasting longer than expected, so Lily began to make full use of the free drinks that came with the privilege of First Class. Dylan seemed to be trying to keep up in some weird kind of supportive gesture and was drinking the same amount as her, although admittedly was handling it slightly better. After a particularly bad jolt, she tensed up completely so Dylan reached across and grabbed her hand, giving it a comforting squeeze.

Even when she thought she was about die any second, she couldn’t ignore the electric shock that went through her when Dylan grabbed her hand. It even started to help take her mind off the flight because suddenly all she could think about was his skin on hers.

When the flight started to smooth and the seatbelt sign was finally switched off, Dylan didn’t let go of her hand. Instead he kept hold of it, both of their hands resting on the top of her thigh. When he began to lazily caress the side of her hand with his thumb, it all became too much.

Whether it was the idea that the plane could go down at any moment, that she had drunk more alcohol than she had in a very long time or the fact she hadn’t had sex in a while and the slightest physical contact was sending her mad, she suddenly became a lot braver. At this moment, she didn’t care about what else was going on, all she knew was that she wanted Dylan Hawkins. Now.

Surprising herself with her boldness, she leant over and whispered to him to meet her in toilet in thirty seconds. She caught the smile on his face when he worked out what was going on as she slipped past him into the aisle. Walking towards the toilet, she quickly glanced at the other passengers but no one was paying any attention. They were all either asleep or occupied with something else.

Stepping into the unoccupied toilet, she remembered not to lock the door and had just enough time to check her reflection in the mirror before Dylan stepped in, locked the door behind him then moved towards her with the look of a man possessed.

His lips crushed hers and his hands clamped on her hips as he pulled her against him. Not to be outdone, Lily matched his enthusiasm as she dug her hands into his hair and tangled her tongue with his. He practically growled and moved her so she was pressed against the wall, lodged between his hard body and said wall. His mouth left hers and he started to drag his tongue down her neck.

She was able to feel through his trousers how hard he already was and it only made her more desperate for him. She wrapped one leg around his waist in an attempt to press herself against his erection to relieve some of the frustration. The fact the plane seemed to be shaking helped immensely with this and she let out a moan the same time as Dylan.

One of his hands was now under her top, kneading her breast through the lace of her bra and it felt amazing. Wanting her hands on him as well, she fumbled with the zip of his trousers and shoved her hand into his boxers, causing him to release a sharp, hot breath against her collarbone. Her hand gripped at the firm flesh and as it twitched and seem to thicken at her touch, she felt a swell of pure, feminine pride.

Then something brought her to her senses.

Someone was knocking at the door. Gently but persistently. Even Dylan seemed to respond to this as his hands froze.

“Excuse me?” A voice came through the locked door. “I’m afraid we have hit a patch of bad weather and everyone is required to return to their seat.”

It was then that the magnitude of what Lily was doing struck her. She had almost joined the Mile-High club, with Dylan Hawkins of all people. But she had been interrupted just in time, although she did currently have her hand in his boxers.

“I think that probably puts an end to things.” Dylan whispered quietly against her ear, so close that she could feel his breath. He actually sounded disappointed. “Hopefully next time we won’t get interrupted.”

There definitely wasn’t going to a next time. There shouldn’t have even been a this time. If she hadn’t been questioning her own mortality, Lily would not be in such a comprising position. She definitely wouldn’t be flying for a very long time after this.

Dylan took a step back, trying to give her as much room as he possibly could in the tiny toilet, while he tucked his shirt back into his now fastened trousers. She caught sight of herself in the mirror looking very ruffled but knew trying to tame her hair wouldn’t make the situation any less embarrassing. Instead she straightened her top and unlocked the door, ready for the scolding she was about to receive.

Instead the stewardess smiled at her. “I’m sorry about this. We just need you to take your seats again while we work our way through the bad weather.”

She was actually apologising for interrupting them!

Lily was sure she had been committing some kind of criminal offense and the pretty air hostess in her neat little uniform was the one apologising to her. She even saw the woman’s eyes flick over to Dylan with an approving look. How often did this sort of thing really happen?

But as she regained full use of her senses, she could understand why they had to return to their seats. There was an awful lot of turbulence and now Lily had no outlet for her fear.

She turned around to look at Dylan, not overly sure what the etiquette was in this situation, but he looked back at her giving her a wry little smile. “You should go sit down. I’m going to need another minute or so.”

Oh God, of course he was.

Wondering if she would die from embarrassment before the plane even had a chance to crash, she hurried back down the aisle trying not to look too guilty, though none of the other passengers seemed to notice or care where she had been. Flopping down in her seat, she tried to ignore the shaking going on around her, but if she tried to push this out of her mind, it was replaced by the memory of Dylan’s hands skilfully caressing her.

Damn. Damn. Damn. She should never have come on this trip.

Dylan eventually took his seat again and looked over at her, although she couldn’t quite focus on him right now because the turbulence seemed to be getting worse. To her surprise, he reached across and took her hand again to try and comfort her. To her increased surprised, it actually helped.

Once they were apparently in the clear, the air crew started to come round with the meals. This meant Dylan had to let go of her hand so he could eat his food. Neither of them spoke and Lily silently picked at her food, desperately wanting this flight to end. Once the meal had been cleared away, Dylan seemed to drift into a deep sleep which she jealously tried to ignore. She would have loved to have slept for the rest of the flight but was too wound up to be able to, so instead she pulled her journal out and started to read through her entries from the last two weeks.

Finally, half an hour later than planned, the plane touched down on the tarmac and wonderful relief spread through her body. Soon she would be off this bloody plane and far away from Dylan Hawkins again.

Dylan made polite small talk with her to make sure she was ok as they headed back into the terminal but she noticed that he seemed to be trying to ensure he didn’t get too close. Not that she could blame him. Now he had slept off any alcohol, he was probably as embarrassed as she was about their little incident. He was probably thinking about all the names he used to call her when they were growing up, relieved nothing had actually happened with little Carrot Top.

As soon as she had her bag from the conveyor belt, she have him a curt goodbye and hastily walked through to Arrivals where both her parents were waiting for her, sporting matching smiles and a board with her name written on it. She hugged both of them and listened to her mother immediately start to wonder if Lily had been eating enough while she was away. If she had been hoping for a power nap on the drive home, she was sadly mistaken. Her parents wanted to hear all about the trip and so for the entire forty minute journey she answered their questions. When they dropped her back at her house, Lily promised she would be round for dinner tomorrow for some “wholesome English food” and then preceded the crash out on the sofa.

Now she knew she wasn’t going to sleep at a decent hour tonight because her internal body clock was all over the place, she made herself a cup of green tea and set her laptop down on her little kitchen table. Flicking through her notebook again, she started to type away at a blog post she was going to upload to the studio’s website.

She worked solidly until well after midnight when she went upstairs and tried to force herself to sleep. She finally drifted off but her restless sleep was filled with dreams of Dylan Hawkins and his annoyingly talented hands. When she woke the following morning, she was frustrated in more than one sense.

Apparently Dylan Hawkins was not happy unless he was tormenting her.


5 Women To Inspire a Healthier Summer

You can tell we’re now into the summer months (even if the weather doesn’t quite feel like that) because everyone is now even more obsessed with the shape of their bodies. I’ve lost count of the number of times I’ve heard people around me say “I’ll lose weight for when I go on holiday.”

The most important thing you need to remember is that if you want to lose weight, you need to do it for yourself and you should be doing it for a reason better than because you’re going on holiday. It should be because you want a healthy lifestyle. And to get a bikini body, just do this:-


I hate to be the bearer of bad news, but very few real people actually look like those bikini models you see in all the magazines. Instead of worrying about how much you need to suck your stomach in, just enjoy your holiday instead. And remember, being healthy is so much better than being thin.

So if you’re looking to get healthier this summer, here are five women to help inspire you. It’s much easier to exercise when the sun is out and salads are much nicer when it’s not freezing!

  1. Cassie Ho

Since discovering Blogilates a couple of months ago, I’ve become a big fan of Cassie’s. All her workout videos are up on YouTube and are completely free. And, if you subscribe to her mailing list, you have access to a monthly exercise plan where you just do the workouts listed for that day. It’s probably about as simple as it gets…although you actually have to do the exercises too!



  1. Krista Stryker 

If you’re one of those people who doesn’t exercise because “you don’t have time” then you need HIIT, which basically means you have no excuses!

HIIT (High Intensity Interval Training) is all about short, sharp bursts of energy and can burn more calories than 1 hour of steady cardio. Krista’s workouts, part of the 12 Minute Athlete, are designed to push you hard in a short space of time. Her website features workouts and exercise demonstrations. And if you download the App, it comes with a very handy interval timer you can use if you’re brave enough to make your own workouts.

Also, check out Krista’s Instagram for some pretty impressive posts that make you want to try your hand at handstands!



  1. Kris Carr

One of the biggest misconceptions people have is that exercise counteracts all the bad things you eat. Trust me, it doesn’t work like that. The fact my diet isn’t as clean as it could be is probably the reason my body is strong enough to run a half-marathon but I don’t have athlete-style abs!

I first came across Kris Carr while watching the Hungry for Change documentary and her story is a truly inspiring one. After being diagnosed with Stage 4 Cancer, she reassessed her lifestyle and used nutrition to boost her immune system.

It’s definitely worth doing some research on her and what she promotes these days. It should inspire you to add a few more greens to your plate at least!



  1. Lucy Bee

Keeping on the topic of a healthy diet, we need to talk about Lucy Bee and her coconut oil. I definitely think coconut oil is now one of my must haves. It’s so versatile – I use it as a daily moisturiser, eye make-up remover, hair mask, to put in smoothies and as a cooking oil! The actual benefits of coconut oil are endless.

Lucy Bee’s coconut oil is ethically source, is organic and Vegan. Her website is full of tips for using the oil, however you want to use it, and if you follow her on social media, she’s always posting recipes for healthy eating, as well as just generally promoting a healthy lifestyle.



  1. Emma Paveley

It’s pretty much a given that all athletes work incredibly hard and what they put their bodies through makes them more-than-human. The reason I picked Emma is because I used to work with her and saw first hand how much effort she put into everything. And along with all the morning gym workouts or using lunch breaks to practice routines, she was able to resist the many, many cakes our office is notorious for bringing in. If willpower was an Olympic sport, she deserved gold!

As well as being the current British Champion and World No 3. for bodybuilding and making the Ninja Warrior course look like a doddle, she’s now part of Team GB and will take part in Baku 2015. Check out her social media to see how she combines strength and flexibility, making it all look so easy and making you want to push yourself just a little harder.


So there you have it – five women to help make this summer your healthiest yet. And if you are planning on honing your bikini body this year, do it because you want to and do it the right way! Remember, strong is the new skinny.



The Marrakech Express

I recently took a trip to Marrakech for a long weekend with some female friends and ended up completely falling in love with the crazy city that it is. I’m pretty well travelled, but this was unlike any place I’d been to before. A city of complete contrasts that assaults every one of your senses..and I highly recommend going!


If you are looking to take a trip there, here are my top five must do’s for Marrakech:-

1. Get a Hamman.

If you like your beauty treatments, it’s definitely worth giving this one a go. A weekly tradition for the locals, it basically involves scrubbing a layer of skin off. This was the first thing I did once I’d checked into my riad to try and relax after the plane journey and queuing in Customs (be warned, this part takes forever!). If you want to go fully local, you need to head to one of the public baths, but I wasn’t quite brave enough and went to the spa around the corner that was affiliated with our riad.

Now, I’ve had my share of strange beauty treatments in the past, but this was something else. As I stood in bikini bottoms in a small, marble room with just candles for lighting, my experience went something like this…

  • Strip down to only bikini bottoms in a darkened room.
  • Lady uses shower to wash you all over.
  • Lady rubs some scented stuff over all visible skin (lots of cupping involved).
  • Lady leaves you to lie down and “relax” for ten minutes. Feels a lot longer and you start to wonder if she’s forgotten about you.
  • Lady finally comes back and proceeds to scrub harshly at all visible skin, actually removing a layer of skin.
  • Rinses the dead skin off you then randomly washes your hair.
  • Leaves you soaking your feet in a tub of water and rose petals. Get the same feeling as Stage 4 after a while.
  • Lady lets you out and you sit down in a comfy chair while drinking mint tea and someone massages your feet.
  • Go for full body massage – relatively normal experience.

But the Hamman and a full body massage ended up costing me about £30 and my skin was super-soft, so I really cannot complain about the process at all!

2. Get lost in the souks.

If you’re going to the souks, be warned that once you’re in, you have to keep going until you get out the other side. And while you’re working your way down the many allies, trying not to get lost, be prepared to get accosted by practically every shop owner on the way…or just random people in the street trying to get you to go to another part of the souk where a member of their family probably has a shop.

But it’s not half as daunting as it sounds. In fact, it’s actually quite a fun experience and you’ll probably come out the other side with a few trinkets you didn’t plan on buying. The best way to go about it is in the traditional Moroccan way – just go with the flow.

When it comes to making a purchase, shopkeepers can be, er, a little enthusiastic in trying to make a sale. Just remain polite and if you don’t want something, be prepared for them not to give up too easily, but it’s all very good natured. If you do want something, be prepared to haggle. To help me with this, I took a conversion sheet I’d thrown together myself, so I didn’t have to do any on-the-spot conversion of currencies. 100 dirham sounds like a lot but then you remember it’s only a couple of quid!

If you’re a tourist, the shopkeepers will probably start at a ridiculous price. Immediately, drop that price by at least a third and work from there. It’s not a concept we’re used to, but it is actually a lot of fun and the shopkeepers quite like getting involved with some tough haggling.


3. Visit the Jardin de Majorelle

As you’re wandering around the Majorelle Gardens (once owned by Yves Saint Laurent) you actually forget where you are. Away from the dusty roads and frantic driving of Marrakech, the gardens are a source of tranquillity. Inside its walls, you can happily while away an hour or so just looking at the calming pools, mass of blues and yellows or the impressive nature.


4. Take a Trip to Café Clock

Tucked down a side street and then through some rubble, Café Clock is hidden out the way but is definitely worth trying to find. The food was amazing and they always seem to have something on. Less touristy, it’s popular with the locals – it seemed to be where the Moroccan Hipsters hung out.

Check out their website to see what entertainment they have on or book one of their special experiences – http://marrakech.cafeclock.com/

I also have to recommend trying their chocolate milkshake!


5. Go on a camel trek

Ok, so this one might not be entirely animal welfare friendly and I still have a little bit of residual guilt for enjoying it so much, but it really was a nice experience. Taken to the outskirts of the city, amongst the palm trees, we were led around on camels for over an hour. What made our trek just that little better were the baby camels that followed us the whole way round. It was officially declared that day that there was nothing more adorable than a baby camel running!


The Perfect Body Myth Part 2

A little while ago, I did a blog post on the perfect body and how it didn’t really exist. In relation to that, I wanted to share the below video that I watched this morning. I recently came across Blogilates and started following the workouts, which are great. I also think Cassey is fantastic and she actively helps to provide positive body messages while doing her videos. I’m sure you can agree that she’s in great shape, looking beautiful and healthy. Take a look at the video below and see what you think about body image after it… https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PsL7W-GHhJA

5 Things I Learned from my Game of Thrones Binge

***Warning – there will be spoilers below***

I don’t tend to watch a lot of television and when I get into a show, it’s usually only once it has finished or when there are a few seasons out at least, so I can start from the beginning and not have to wait weeks for the next episode. With the exception of The Mindy Project, there isn’t actually a show I watch religiously on a regular basis.

And then I started watching Game of Thrones.

I’d tried to watch it when it had first come out after hearing that it was the new big thing, but I didn’t get past the first episode. Although this was probably due to the fact I tried watching the first episode on a red-eye flight from New York back to the UK and I didn’t have a fully functioning brain at the time.

There have been a lot of GoT conversations going on in the office recently, especially when one of my friends became hooked and had her own binge. I was planning on giving it another try and watching it at the end of August in the two weeks I have free after leaving work, before moving to another country. But instead, I ended up being peer pressured into watching it before season five starts, so I can get up to date.

Despite not having watched it before, I actually knew all the big plot spoilers. I knew Ned Stark got his head chopped off, I knew what happened in the Red Wedding and I knew all about Joffrey dying and making everyone very happy. The good thing was, I knew all of this and I still enjoyed it! It seems that GoT is now going to be other show I watch week-in-week-out!

But even knowing most of the big events and who the characters were, here are 5 things I learned from my GoT binge:-

  • Jon Snow knows quite a lot.

I knew of the quote telling Jon Snow that he knew nothing, so I kind of assumed he was supposed to be a little bit dim, maybe completely conceited and thinks he’s smarter than he actually is. Turns out, he knows loads! People need to start listening to him more because he’s the only one who talks some sense and it’s almost down to him that The Wall is still standing.

    • No one is allowed to be happy. 

    Like, no one at all. If they begin to feel even a little happy, something awful happens. It can get more depressing than an EastEnders’ Christmas Special. And much like a soap opera, weddings are not joyous occasions.

      • The women are the ones who are in control.

      The big strength of GoT is that everyone loves the characters and they’re written very well – the female characters especially. In a world where men think they run everything because they have swords and whatnot, it’s actually the women working behind them who are wielding power. There are some very awesome, strong female characters – Daenerys, Cat Stark, Brienne, Olenna Tyrell and especially Arya!


        • There’s A LOT of incest.

        Lots of inappropriate brother-sister touching and then a lot of full-on inappropriate brother-sister action. And if you’re a Lannister, maybe throw a cousin in there if a sibling isn’t handy. Maybe they should avoid the incest because it results in this…


        • You need IMDB at the ready for every episode you watch.

        With most characters having the average lifespan of a gnat, there is a massive turnover each episode and you’ll find yourself watching it, sure you recognise one of the actors and wanting to know what you’ve seen them in before. A quick pause, check IMDB, go “oh, it’s so-and-so!” then you may resume.

        And three things I already knew:-

        • Sean Bean dies.

        Obviously! Were people really that surprised? I’d be more surprised if Sean Bean was in a role that let him survive until the end.

        • Winter is coming.

        Although I now understand the whole importance of it and that winter can actually last a couple of years.


        • Tyrion is the best.

        Every time he rocks up on screen, it instantly gets better.


        So I will now be joining the millions of other people eagerly awaiting the start of Season 5 and it’s going to be interesting now I’m on the same page as everyone else. I’m not sure if I’m looking forward to the surprises or not!


        The Best and Worst Disney Princess Role Models

        I have now seen the latest Cinderella film and have admit that I was a little bit hesitant of watching it. While I like the original, I think Cinderella is one of the more annoying of the Disney princesses. She doesn’t really have that much about her and seems to just cry and languish, while letting others deal with everything. That might have been ok in the fifties, but for more modern-day audiences, she just doesn’t have that much too her.

        And don’t even get me started on her prince! He spends the night dancing with her and then apparently doesn’t remember what she looks like the next day. She was blonde – at least go with that for a start!

        Thankfully the newest Cinderella manages to iron out the kinks from the animation. They give Ella more depth while still retaining the underlying fact that it is her kindness and hope that sees her through. And it’s a nice touch that she and the prince can have a conversation before the ball, making their relationship seem more believable and they initially begin to fall in love because of an intellectual attraction, as well as a physical one.

        This got me thinking about the rest of the Disney princesses. While I’m a massive fan of Disney films, there a few of the princesses that are rather irritating when you think about it. Obviously, some of the problems are due to the time period they we released, when the depiction of women wasn’t quite the priority.


                        So here is my take on the best and worst Disney princess role models:-

        The Best:-

        Mulan – She disguises herself as a man to join the army and save her father, gets a Rocky-style montage and becomes the best soldier in the unit. Even when she gets found out (after saving everyone) she still goes on to save the whole of China.


        Merida – A Disney princess who refuses to marry and is still unmarried at the end of the film. And she’s handier with a bow and arrow than Katniss Everdeen.


        Elsa/Anna – A nice sign of Disney moving into the 21st century. We can have a queen without her having to have a king and both Elsa and Anna have a complete personality. There’s a nice inside joke that the idea of want to marry someone after only having just met them and the central love story is about sisterly love.

        Jasmine – Nicely feisty and stands up for herself. And she’s more than happy to marry for love, even if he is a penniless orphan, instead of just choosing any old prince.


        The Worst:-

        Aurora – Sleeping Beauty meets a stranger in the woods, doesn’t even know his name and then throws a strop when she won’t get the chance to see him when he turns up at her house, even though she’s just discovered she’s a princess. She’d rather entertain a stranger than finally get to meet her real parents after sixteen years. In the whole film, she only sings, dances, throws a hissy fit, sleeps and has awesome hair. That’s it really.


        Cinderella – Original Disney Cinderella doesn’t seem to have that much depth to her. While it follows the idea of being good and believing in magic so everything will work out ok in the end, Cinderella seems to just put up with her station in life, cries a few times, lets other people sort things out for her (a fairy godmother or pet mice) then falls in love with a man who can’t even remember what she looks like after a night of dancing with her.

        Ariel – The Little Mermaid is probably one of my favourite Disney films but Ariel is a complete drip – although she is only sixteen, so maybe she can be forgiven for that. She willing trades her voice for legs, changing everything about her, all for a bloke she’s laid eyes on once and she’s supposed to rely simply on her looks to win him over. Not the greatest message for young girls.


        Obviously there’s a few more princesses who I haven’t included, mainly because I feel they’re kind of down the middle. While Rapunzel and Belle are better role models than some of the older Disney princesses, I don’t find Snow White that bad, if you take all things into consideration.

        What do you think? Who would you include in the best and the worst?



        Happy International Women’s Day!

        Although do we still need one? Surely we should have reached the point where we don’t need a special day to think about the achievements women have made throughout history? Surely that should just occur every day?

        Sadly, we’re not quite at this point just yet, although I like to think we’re getting there. But to get there, everyone needs to work together. Women need each other – support your fellow woman, don’t judge her!

        The important part of International Women’s Day is the international. Growing up in the UK, things are a lot more equal than in many countries. We have freedom, we have the right to vote, to drive, to work, to marry or not and a million other things we take for granted every single day. You don’t have to feel guilty for having these things but don’t squander the rights you do have. The General Election is right around the corner. Voting is a chance to do something that too many people in the world don’t get to do.

        Just remember, anyone can do anything, regardless of gender, race or background. At the end of the day, we’re all human after all.

        Oh, and in the interest of equality, there is an International Men’s Day too (19th November) – just so you know.

        I’ll leave you now with just a few of my favourite quotes from women I greatly admire, in the spirit of IWD.










        Oscars 2015

        The Awards Season is now done and dusted for another year and it’s been a great ride.


        With Sunday night’s Oscar ceremony bringing things to an end, I didn’t think I did too badly with the predictions I laid out in my previous post. I got four out of four in the acting categories (ok, so all the favourites won, which meant it wasn’t actually that difficult.) I slipped up on picking Boyhood over Birdman, but it’s not the end of the world.

        What I quite enjoyed about this year’s Oscars was how political it became in places. Some of these A-Listers know the platform Oscar night gives them and used the opportunity to voice some issues that needed a voice, which I admired greatly. From Reese Witherspoon pushing along the Ask Her More campaign message to Patricia Arquette’s empowering speech, it turned out to be a night for the girls.

        NPH even managed to get a joke in right at the beginning about the lack of diversity this year, which is a bit of shame considering 2014’s ceremony was a veritable smorgasbord of diversity and talent. Where 2014 had big winners in 12 Years A Slave and Dallas Buyer’s Club, which were powerful stories, highlighting important issues, I felt a little let down that Birdman was at the forefront of everything year – especially when a film like Selma was in contention as well.

        So, here are my top five moments from the 2015 Oscar ceremony, in no particular order:-

        • The Opening Number

        I’m a big fan of musical numbers to open Oscar ceremonies (Hugh Jackman’s in 2009 is still my favourite) and this didn’t disappoint, giving NPH a chance to do what he does best. A wonderfully written and performed song, it was the perfect homage to the history of cinema, reminding us why we love it. And Anna Kendrick’s cameo only helped make it more amazing – although I don’t think I can condone her throwing a Jimmy Choo across a stage.

        • Everything is Awesome

        When The Lego Movie is involved, everything indeed is awesome. It just may have been the happiest thing I’ve ever witness and was probably worth going to the Oscars just to be able to watch it live. Or at least pick up a Lego Oscar (think Oprah loved hers!).


        • Lady Gaga’s Performance

        I’m not going to lie, I was completely blown away, and a tad surprised, the second she opened her mouth for her Sound of Music medley. I’ve got some of her songs on my iPod and know that she has a good voice, but just, wow. She definitely gave Julie Andrews a run for her money. It was truly beautiful.

        • Patricia Arquette’s Acceptance Speech

        She got her thank-yous out of the way, then moved into a powerful, moving speech that felt like she was addressing the UN rather than Hollywood. Total Girl Power. And she had Meryl Streep and J-Lo fully in her corner the whole time.


        • John Legend’s Glory Performance

        Most of the Oscar top moments seem to be music based, but this Best Song nominee had a very different reaction to The Lego Movie or the opening number. Seeing the audience become so moved by a song they have tears in their eyes is wonderful. It was powerful stuff.

        So those are my top five moments. A couple of notable mentions go to Eddie Redmayne’s excitable acceptance speech and Clint Eastwood not getting NPH’s Kanye West joke at all.

        The Oscars may be over for another year, but that doesn’t mean we can’t get excited about next year’s already. There are some fantastic films coming out over the course of 2015 and a lot to look forward to. There’s already buzz surrounding certain films that, on-paper, seem awards worthy. Will Eddie Redmayne pick up another nomination for The Danish Girl? Can Bradley Cooper get nominated for a fourth year in a row? Will Meryl Streep be able add another award to what already must be a mansion full of statues? She’s playing Emmeline Pankhurst in a film about the suffragette movement, so they might as well just engrave her name on the Best Actress award now!

        There’ll be no dress critique this section though. After saying how much I admired the #AskHerMore campaign, it seems a bit hypocritical to write about the designer dresses. I love a good couture dress as much as the next person, but when they are doing red carpet interviews, I’m equally as interested in hearing about the career and opinions of the woman being interviewed.

        How did you feel about the 2015 Oscars and do you agree with my top moments?

        Are there any films coming out this year you’re already excited about?


        The Bechdel Test

        There’s a lot being discussed at the moment regarding the diversity, or lack thereof, in cinema these days. With the most recent Oscar nominations, there was a bit of an uproar at how it seems to be a white boys club.

        Despite some amazing talent out there, women still don’t seem be able to access the same heights as their male counterparts. The highest paid actress in 2014 (Angelina Jolie at $33million) was 10th in the list if you combined males and females. While that amount of money seems very good, if you take a look at the bigger picture, you see some very big female names earning a lot less than the men.


        One of the ways of assessing how female-friendly a film is these days is by using the Bechdel Test. The criteria for it is relatively straightforward. It consists of three rules which must all be met for it to pass the test:-

        1. It has to have at least two [named] women in it…
        2. …Who talk to each other…
        3. …About something besides a man.

        You’d be surprised how many films you think would fit this criteria actually don’t.

        Obviously, the rules need to be taken with a pinch of salt. You need to consider the context of a film before completely judging it. If it’s a biopic based in a man’s prison, then it’s pretty good odds there won’t be a woman involved. However, if it’s a film where there are plenty of female characters milling around, but not being utilised properly and stereotyped, that’s where we’re going to hit a problem and I think it’s the issues in these sorts of films that need to be addressed.

        I’ve taken a look at my own top five films to see if they would pass or fail the Bechdel Test…

        1. The Princess Bride – FAILED

        There are only two named female characters in the whole film (Buttercup and Valerie) and they don’t get the chance to interact. I don’t really mind the character of Buttercup, but I do find her a little bit too helpless. And that scene with the ROUS always annoys me because she just stands there while Westley is getting attacked, when she could at least try to help.

        2. Some Like it Hot – PASSED

        Even if you’re not classing Tony Curtis and Jack Lemmon as women in this, it still passes the test thanks to the scenes on the train. If you are, then it passes with flying colours!


        3. Life is Beautiful – FAILED

        Again, very few named female characters in this. Though the heart of the story comes from the father-son relationship and Guido trying to protect his son in the concentration camp.

        4. Lord of the Rings – FAILED

        It fails over all three films. Granted, they were working off the original text and Tolkien doesn’t have a great number of female characters (in The Hobbit, Peter Jackson had to create a female character since there were none included in the book). Even though it fails the test, its redeeming factor is that the few named female characters are pretty bad-ass. Case and point, Eowyn’s battle with the Witch King.


         5. Pan’s Labyrinth – PASSED

        A lot of interaction between two female characters here (mother and daughter). Plus it’s a real plus that the central protagonist, Ofelia, is a very strong character, despite being so young.


        How do your own favourite films measure up against the test?


        Oscar 2015 Predictions

        Sorry things have been a little bit quiet on the Awards Seasons front recently. All my writing time has been focused on my books, which meant I bypassed the BAFTAs completely. My very quick commentary on them is that I personally didn’t think there were any big surprises with the winners that evening, Stephen Fry was wonderful as per usual and having Chris Evans and Henry Cavill present an award together almost broke my television! Well played to the organisational team on that one!


        So tonight is the end of the season and we finish up on the peak of the awards mountain. The Oscars will take place later and by the time everyone will have woken up in the UK tomorrow morning, all the little statues will have been handed out. I think I’m more excited about Neil Patrick Harris presenting than the awards themselves because you know there are going to be some awesome musical numbers in there.

        So my penultimate blog post on the Awards Season 2015 will be my predictions for tonight – hopefully I won’t get it too wrong!

        Best Picture

        This has become a two-horse race between Birdman and Boyhood now, with most of the awards this season being split, but I think Boyhood is just going to edge it and take the award home tonight.

        Who I’d like to win – Selma, The Grand Budapest Hotel or Whiplash. I still haven’t seen Boyhood and I felt Birdman was pretty overrated. I enjoyed all the other nominees much, much more and think I would rather see one of them win it, especially one of the aforementioned three.


        Best Director

        Another head to head between Boyhood and Birdman, although again, I think Boyhood will edge this. Richard Linklater will end up with the award – making a film over twelve years kind of works in your favour!

        Who I’d like to win – Wed Anderson. I greatly enjoyed The Grand Budapest Hotel and thought everything about it was well done. Although I would have really liked to see Ava DuVernay (Selma) or Angelina Jolie (Unbroken) in this category. Partly to fly the flag for female directors and partly because they both did amazing jobs this year and deserved to be recognised.

        Best Actor

        I read an interesting article saying that the race between Eddie Redmayne and Michael Keaton might cause them to cancel each other out and Bradley Cooper could sweep in and steal the award. The important thing to remember is that he hasn’t been around for the other awards, so we can’t do any real comparisons. Though I thought it was a standout performance and Cooper’s best yet, I think the award will still (fully deservedly) go to Eddie Redmayne.

        Who I’d like to win – Eddie Redmayne #TeamEddie!


        Best Actress

        A strong category this year which is lovely to see, but it seems that if Julianne Moore doesn’t walk away with the Oscar, someone will have mucked up counting the votes!

        Who I’d like to win – This is only on the basis that Still Alice hasn’t been released in the UK yet. I wouldn’t mind Rosamund Pike winning. She put in a fantastic performance for Gone Girl.


        Best Supporting Actor

        As with the Best Actress award, think this one is a pretty safe bet. J.K Simmons looks like he’ll be taking an Oscar home later, which I’ve got no problem with at all. His performance was amazing, if not a little terrifying. The tension in the Rushing or Dragging scene makes it one of the standout of the film.

        Who I’d like to win – If for some reason J.K Simmons doesn’t get it (which is highly unlikely), Mark Ruffalo is equally as deserving.

        Best Supporting Actress

        Everything points to this going to Patricia Arquette. Afraid I still can’t comment as I still haven’t seen Boyhood (sorry!)

        Who I’d like to win – I really enjoyed both Laura Dern’s performance in Wild and Keira Knightley’s in The Imitation Game, so wouldn’t mind seeing either of those taking it.


        So that’s it. Those are my predictions for the big six awards. Now we just have to wait and see how right or wrong I was.

        I’ll be back tomorrow with my final post to cover the winners, any potential surprises, NPH and the dresses!